Category Archives: Christian Comedians

Funny Customized Personal Video for The Chapel in Fort Wayne, Indiana

Marty Simpson makes personalized videos for every ticketed event he does at churches. We found this one and thought it was funny. It is for an event at The Chapel in Fort Wayne, Indiana in January of 2015. If you would like to have a ticketed event at your church we are sure Marty would make these type videos for your show also. Check it out! Looks like a fun event.

Marty Simpson’s NEW DVD is Finally Here!

Marty Simpson’s new DVD has garnered some national attention already by being featured on Christian Televisions shows on the Lasea Broadcasting Network, TBN, and others. Look for an upcoming feature article about Marty and his new project in Lifeway Christian Bookstore’s sentinel magazine, “Home Life.” Check out a sample of Marty’s new DVD, “Clean If It Kills Me” below and buy your copy at his website.

Marty Simpson’s Clean If It Kills Me

Pretentious Christian Comedian Demands The Kitchen Sink on His Rider

Marty Simpson's Rider
Everyone has heard stories of famous rock bands demanding certain incredibly specific things on their riders like “only green M & M’s” or “Chex Mix with no bagel chips.” We had always chalked it up to the stuff of legend. Well now, Christian Comedian Marty Simpson has taken this concept to a new extreme.

Included in his demands are hotel rooms for his two golden doodles, pH balanced water in the hotel room toilets in case the doodles drink from the aforementioned toilets, reimbursements for expenses during travel including toll roads, amusement park fees, snow cones, bail money, and back massages, as well as a host of other idiosyncratic demands. Not the least of which is,

In lieu of a sound system, Marty prefers to connect his microphone to a splitter that will go to two large jam (and/or boom) boxes. These boxes should be on the left and right of the stage. They should be held over their head by two 17 year old boys, both of whom should be wearing beige trench coats.
– Excerpt from Page 2 of Marty Simpson’s Rider –

The nerve of some artists is astounding. But evidently some people don’t agree. Here is a recent quote from one of the clients who booked Marty for a show.

I just read Marty’s rider. Not only was it refreshing, it made me blow milk out of my nose. I totally didn’t see it coming.
– Lance G. Flood, M.A. – Executive Director – Tennessee Valley Pastoral Counseling

Take a look at Marty Simpson’s rider here and see if you agree.

 

Marty Simpson Performs with Tim Hawkins

Marty Simpson got the chance to perform with Tim Hawkins. One of those times, Tim kept Marty on stage after Marty’s “middle set” and performed the “Tweet Song” along side Marty. The “Tweet Song” is when Tim plays the guitar and two (or more) comics recite some of their funnier tweets back and forth. Marty doesn’t play any musical instrument, so he decided to surprise Tim with a little something he is good at doing. Tim was not aware Marty was going to juggle.

Marty Simpson Performs with Andrew Young and Dennis Miller

In the past 12 months, Christian Comedian, Marty Simpson, has proven himself to be one of the most versatile comedians working today. He has received overwhelmingly positive feedback from two polar opposite camps of people. Dennis Miller on the conservative right, and Andrew Young on the, not as conservative, left.

Marty Simpson shown here after the show with Dennis Miller.
Marty Simpson shown here after the show with Dennis Miller.

In September of 2012, former SNL star, Dennis Miller and his people, hand picked Marty from a group of comics to open for Mr. Miller at the Durham Performing Arts Center in front of 2,600 people. That event went extremely well and Mr. Miller was pleased.

Then, in May of 2013, Marty was selected to be the comedian representative at a national leadership forum hosted in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina (See that event here.) Marty shared the stage with Civil Rights hero, Andrew Young. Mr. Young is the former mayor of Atlanta, former Ambassador to the United Nations, and close personal friend of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Mr. Young was pleased and impressed with Marty’s comedy. He commented afterwards how well Marty used racial topics, and used them appropriately, to communicate humor. Mr. Young was also moved by Marty’s ability to seamlessly move from comedy to a leadership message which Mr. Young thought all parents of young athletes need to hear.

Marty Simpson and Andrew Young
Marty Simpson shown here with Andrew Young. Marty performed a one hour comedy show which contained many leadership applications at the Leadership Summit in Myrtle Beach, SC. Andrew Young followed Marty’s performance with his keynote talk.
There aren’t many Christian Comedians working today who would be the right person to open for Dennis Miller, who is a regular political commentator on Fox News Channel’s “The O’Reilly Factor,” and simultaneously be the right person to open for a keynote address delivered by long-time Civil Rights hero, and former Democratic Mayor of Atlanta, Andrew Young.

But Marty was that person. Check out Marty’s comedy below or at his website at www.MartySimpson.com.

If you think Marty’s comedy and leadership message would be a good fit for your event, you can contact Will Montgomery, at Gresham Hill Management, at 615.258.4141 ext. 306 or by E-mail at will@greshamhill.com.

 

Marty Simpson

Christian Comedian Marty Simpson

marty_winner_martysimpson

 

Christian Comedian Marty Simpson’s Bio

Christian Comedian Marty SimpsonMarty Simpson is a happy husband, father, and comedian. He loves his wife and kids. He tells them before every athletic contest, “Remember, no matter what happens in the game tonight, Daddy loves you, win or tie.”

Marty’s “love language” is sarcasm. Get the popular t-shirt at Marty Simpson’s website here.

He realizes that this one is not listed in Gary Smalley’s book, “The Five Love Languages” but is confident it will be added to updated versions soon.

Marty’s act is filled with actual events from his life. Everything he says is a true story based on something that either happened to him, his kids, or that he made up entirely. (Do we need to point out that this is sarcasm? Wow, even the parantheticals have sarcasm.)  Let’s talk about Marty!

Marty Simpson doesn’t look like an All-American Football Player, a sports radio talk show host, or a national touring comedian. Let’s be honest, he looks like Dr. Phil’s heavier brother. But believe it or not, Marty was the first South Carolinian to be named a USA Today All-American Football Player. (**1)

He also doesn’t look like he would have an amazingly beautiful wife which he’s been happily married to for over 20 years, but that’s true too! The rest of this bio may make it sound like Marty is a “super-macho” type whose comedy may only work for athletically minded folks, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Marty’s comedy is rooted in his life experiences which include antics with his wife, children and golden doodles, as well as well as the occasional sports story. (But keep in mind, when Marty played football, he wasn’t a real player, he was just the kicker!)

Let’s reminisce, shall we, about Marty’s glory days before he had kids and his hair fell out, which oddly enough, didn’t happen in that order. In 1992, Marty was the leading scorer for the Gamecocks (**2) while maintaining a punting average of close to 40 yards.

Click here to see video of Marty’s 61 yard field goal and his other amazing plays while at Spring Valley High School and the University of South Carolina.

So after garnering all kinds of school, state, and NCAA records {Actually no NCAA records, but it just flowed better to write it that way} as a kicker for his high school and the South Carolina Gamecocks, Marty went on to teach drama and coach football at the high school level. Yes, you heard that correctly. Marty took his Theater degree from South Carolina and used it to take a high school football team all the way to the state championship in the fall, and then produced and directed Oscar Wilde’s “The Importance of Being Earnest” to sell-out crowds that spring. Marty says, “Every fall, I just ‘acted’ like the football coach.”

But enough about theater, let’s talk some more football. Statistically speaking, Marty was actually a pretty good football coach. Prior to becoming the head coach at Ben Lippen, the high school team had never had a winning record. But while Marty was a head coach, they made the play-offs on four different occasions and produced a winning record each season but one. Marty claims his losing season was his best coaching. He feels like the team had enough talent to go 1 and 10 and he took them to a 3 and 8 season. The players’ parents of this team don’t agree with Marty about this being his best year coaching, but that’s because they can’t fathom the truth about how awful at football their kids were.

Just for kicks, you can see a video of Marty’s P.E. Trick Shots by clicking here. Or, if you’re tired of hearing about Marty, Marty, Marty… check out Samkon Gado: one of Marty’s former players. Or if you aren’t tired of hearing about Marty, you can check out a video of his coaching days here.

Marty garnered national recognition after becoming the winner of the 2012 Clean Comedy Challenge. Since that time, you may have seen Marty opening for Saturday Night Live’s Dennis Miller (if you were at that one show, that one night), Tim Hawkins, Pauly Shore, and Last Comic Standing Winners, Jon Reep and John Heffron.

Today, Marty does indeed have that rare form of comedy that makes both young and old, tall and short…. laugh (although he does still have a hard time with Clemson fans). You can see Marty’s comedic production skills at work on a series of successful online videos including the “Domination” series about his beloved South Carolina Gamecocks or various other videos at his youtube channel.

Marty is also a popular radio guest on Sports Talk radio in the South Carolina area. He has co-hosted the formerly popular “Corey Miller Show” on 560 The Team in Columbia, as well as made dozens of appearances on 107.5 The Game.

Marty is also a featured columnist for the Rivals.com network and a very respected football analyst. His weekly “Big-Play Breakdown” articles for the South Carolina Gamecocks were wildly popular with more than just Gamecock fans. Here are a few examples: Article #1 and/or Article #2.

Marty also writes the occasional hard core journalism piece for the same Rivals.com network. And no matter what the Clemson message boards say about what a terrible journalist he is, or how little research he must do for his articles, these articles are rooted in 100% stone cold researched facts. They are in no way, shape or form intended to be satirical in anyway. Two of these articles are linked here: Non-Satire Article #1 and/or Non-Satire Article #2.

Marty stays busy at live standup shows throughout North America and has performed in venues from the Durham Performing Arts Center which held three thousand the night Marty performed there, to Atlanta’s Uptown Comedy Corner, all the way to Los Angeles’ Flappers Comedy Club. Marty’s performance venues include clubs, churches, fund-raisers, festivals, corporate functions, and the occasional rock’n roll tour. Marty’s updates on Facebook, Twitter, and Youtube keep his fans and two or three of his friends laughing everyday. Follow him on twitter @MartySimpson.

**Footnotes**
**1. 1990 U.S.A. Today All-American – Marty wasn’t a real football player, he was just the kicker. But he was voted the best in the country in 1990 after setting the South Carolina state record with a 61 yard field goal and kicking the walk off winning field goal to win the Class AAAA Division 1 State Championship by a score of 3 to 0. See video of Marty’s playing days.

**2. A Gamecock is a rooster that is known for its tenacity…seriously.

 

 

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What Others Said about Marty Simpson

We recently hired Marty to entertain a few hundred kids for us at our church camp, Salkahatchie. His stuff was hilarious!! These kids were laughing nonstop for an hour and a half. His goofy style of clean comedy is refreshing and our camp kids said it was the best entertainment we’ve ever had for them!!


John Covert
Owner Covert Homes
Director of 2010 (Bythewood, SC) Salkahatchie

Read here for other things said about Marty’s performances.

Jonnie W.

 

Who Is Jonnie?

“Laughter is the shortest distance between two people.” -Victor Borge

Few things have the power to connect us like laughter. It can heal, teach, point out injustice and hypocrisy, and break down barriers between us. With nothing more than a guitar and his razor-sharp wit, Jonnie W. has delighted audiences nationwide. More than just another comedy show, he blends music and traditional standup for a multimedia comedy experience not to be missed.

-Featured in WORLD Magazine’s Article “Church Clean, Club Funny”
-Winner of the 2010 Clean Comedy Challenge
-Featured in Upcoming Independent Lens Documentary on Clean Comedy

Why Choose Jonnie?
Every now and again, Jonnie likes to pay his mortgage and even eat a meal or two. “How can I help?” you may ask. Well, I’ll tell you. Hire Jonnie for your next event, and you won’t just be feeding your mind, you’ll be feeding Jonnie.

Visit Jonnie W.’s website here.